Cigarette Reviews

I am going to start using this blog for something more important than I’ve used it for so far. So, introducing: cigarette reviews.

Since taking up smoking, all there really has been to go on is word-of-mouth recommendations for which cigarette brand is the best. But a lot of these people, I suspect, won’t have tried everything. And if they have, they may not really remember every experience. From my own experiences, how much one enjoys a cigarette can depend on the mood and the setting, so even personal recommendation can be biased or misleading. But I am going to change all that. Here, in writing, will be the review of every new brand of cigarette I try from now on, written after having smoked one in the same environment at roughly the same time of day, with no distractions. Complete with vital statistics, like quantities of chemicals and price at the time of purchase, I’ll give each brand a written analysis and a score out of ten.

When I have a list of enough, I will create a page for my top five or top ten in a constantly updated list, taking into account everything, from how long they last to how economical they are. Stay tuned.

Silk Cut Purple

Vital Stats

Tar: 5mg
Nicotine: 0.5mg
Carbon Monoxide: 5mg
Price: £3.00 (pack of ten)

Silk Cut Purple

The first thing you will notice upon being handed a pack of Silk Cut over the counter is that the edges of the box are rounded. The white, clean packaging, especially on the Silver variety, feels modern and would not look out of place in one of those minimalist, spotless kitchens you see on TV adverts, where chrome utensils hang on hooks over the top of an electric stove. The hinged lid of the box has also been designed slightly differently from the norm, bisecting the logo on the front in a very aesthetically pleasing carton. A friend described them to me as “very middle-class,” and I agreed, stating, “I’m buying them because they are expensive.”

With expectations heightened from the elevated price tag, I was anxious to find out what justified the slightly increased cost, and whether it was worth it overall. I flipped open the lid and a corner of it came apart in my hands. I bit back my quiet disappointment that rose in my mind from fears that the modern look was just to conceal a very mediocre interior and drew forth one of the cigarettes — not judging a book (solely) by its cover applies here, too.

Putting aside the unremarkable flavour and aroma, the main quality I found Silk Cut Purple to have was how excellently long they last. Usually I’ll take the opportunity to buy superkings size of a brand; the additional price seems disproportionately smaller than the extra length on each cigarette, but with these, the unavailability of a longer cigarette didn’t matter. I felt that each one could hold its own or at least outlast a cheaper, longer smoke.

The taste was pleasant, but nothing more special than average. Each one went down with a soothing smoothness, which I realise could be attributed to the fact that they are “lites,” but I am more inclined to believe that their smoothness is thanks to high quality. Silk Cut Purple are an easy, long-lived smoke that do not disappoint, though for the price tag one might be justified in expecting a slightly richer flavour.

Overall: 7 out of 10.

Benson & Hedges: Sovereign

Vital Stats

Tar: 10mg
Nicotine: 0.8mg
Carbon Monoxide: 10mg
Price: £2.60 (pack of ten)

B&H: Sovereign

Lifting the lid of this black box and raising the open pack to my nose, I couldn’t help but detect a richness to Sovereign that I’d not smelled from even more expensive cigarettes. The gold lines of the box’s design and the raised name and emblem on the front bespeak a certain classy feel that I’ve otherwise yet to experience. The scent was promising and full, despite the slightly agitated night air easing past, and I brought the first one to my lips with some anticipation.

That is not where the good points of this brand end, but it is where the negative aspects start to set in. I felt that the first one had a very hasty start, as though it couldn’t wait to get burning. The first third of the cigarette seemed to rush by in a shambling haste that seemed to pierce the sophisticated veneer of the first impression. Each drag had a definite, blunt bite to it that was uncharacteristic and rocky. The taste of the smoke was unremarkable.

The exhale was smoother, though, and the aftertaste smacked of the richness I had smelled earlier. The lingering flavour was almost enough, I had nearly decided, to vindicate the bumpy start to the cigarette, when all of a sudden, that was it. It was over and felt too reminiscent of having talked big but walked small and left me feeling hard done by and cheated. My expectations of a delicious and long-lasting experience were revealed to be a feat that was too much to be asked of these now-seeming pretentious and posturing cigarettes.

While putting on a façade of nobility, Sovereign’s mask was dropped to reveal more of a bastard son of a noble than pure-blood royalty, and the emulated richness in smell and aftertaste merely a novelty, a quirk, of an otherwise run-of-the-mill concoction.

Overall: 6 out of 10.